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Post by jeyu0422 on Oct 15, 2015 23:40:47 GMT -5
Post Acute Withdrawl (PAW) Exerpted From "Staying Sober" By: Terence T. Gorski SYMPTOMS OF POST ACUTE WITHDRAWAL There are six major types of PAW symptoms. They are the inability to think clearly, memory problems, emotional overreactions and numbness, sleep disturbances, physical coordination problems, and general problems in managing stress. The inability to solve usually simple problems because of any or all of these symptoms leads to diminished self-esteem. A person often feels incompetent, embarrassed, and not okay about themselves. Diminished self-esteem and the fear of failure interfere with productive and challenging living.Part of my difficulty in learning to live a happy and rewarding life without alcohol is that I never effectively learned how to deal with the problems associated with life. I was conditioned over many years to escape them through alcohol. When I decided to quit drinking, I expected my problems to go away, and certainly some of those caused by alcohol abuse did rather quickly. But the desire to escape, rather than deal with stress, emotions, etc. was still there because it had been a way of life for many years. The path to sobriety, for me, has been about learning, in some instances for the first time, how to navigate myself through situations where escape had become instinct. This became especially difficult when faced with periodic bouts of PAWS. I only know of two ways to deal with PAWS, either drink (not an option) or wait it out and plow through the day to day tasks of living, knowing or at least hoping that there are better days ahead, and relying on the work of recovery to get through to the other side. I think so many people relapse just because of this. PAWS, the desperate efforts of the addicted brain to get its fix. Statistics say it usually works; the addicted brain usually wins out. But armed with the knowledge, mostly gained here, I have been able to ride out those episodes of PAWS and gain some experience and confidence in the process. I will be 18 months next week. I am just coming through my most significant episode of PAWS. I won, at least this round, and if I never win the war but also never lose a battle, I suppose I will be, in effect, the ultimate winner of my internal battle. I no longer crave alcohol and I haven't in a long time, but there are times when I DO crave escape. My knowing that these are times when I am most vulnerable to relapse have been very important in avoiding a relapse. As new problem solving skills are learned and new methods of dealing with stress are developed, I have found that the problems are not insurmountable and the stress not quite as severe. As much as anything, this is an explanation of why I haven't been very active around here lately. Quite honestly, I just couldn't think of much that I considered worth saying. Some may think I should have waited it out a little longer. ? Mark/Jeyu
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Post by JoeY on Oct 16, 2015 4:40:50 GMT -5
Hi Mark and congrats on the upcoming 18 months. PAWS kicked my ass completely and i didn't know there was such a thing till i was over 4 months without a drink. i was greatly relieved when i did finally found out WTF was wrong with me. to refresh. i had quit drinking twice before and went through the 3 days of hell then after a week i felt pretty good. but the last time i was still gong downhill after 4 months of having quit, i truly thought i had really done it to myself this time (permanent brain damage). i still was working all that time and got away with it because i worked 3rd shift so could hide out a lot and even sneak in naps here and there. but after 4 months i could no longer do my job and had to take leave of work. folks if any of you have quit and are still feeling like hell weeks after quitting you most likely have PAWS. PAWS can last up to two years and only time will heal you. as Mark stated having PAWS can make one want to drink just to relieve the horrible symptoms that come with it but you have to be strong and not give in to it. i made it through Mark is as well so you can too. there is plenty reading out there about PAWS if you care to learn more about it.
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PAWS
Oct 16, 2015 7:54:20 GMT -5
Post by Dana on Oct 16, 2015 7:54:20 GMT -5
Hi Mark, I'm glad you shared this. Methinks you've helped more people than you'll ever know. Keep up the good fight!
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PAWS
Oct 16, 2015 8:00:51 GMT -5
JoeY likes this
Post by Deleted on Oct 16, 2015 8:00:51 GMT -5
I will be 18 months next week. I am just coming through my most significant episode of PAWS. I won, at least this round, and if I never win the war but also never lose a battle, I suppose I will be, in effect, the ultimate winner of my internal battle. I no longer crave alcohol and I haven't in a long time, but there are times when I DO crave escape. My knowing that these are times when I am most vulnerable to relapse have been very important in avoiding a relapse. As new problem solving skills are learned and new methods of dealing with stress are developed, I have found that the problems are not insurmountable and the stress not quite as severe. I highlighted that text because it's profound -- and also because it takes guts to come out and say that like you did. I'm sorry about your PAWS episode, Mark; I know from personal experience how truly awful it can be. Hopefully, with 18 months under your belt, you're done with the awfulness for good.
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PAWS
Oct 16, 2015 10:06:02 GMT -5
Post by JoeY on Oct 16, 2015 10:06:02 GMT -5
it's in our human make up to want to escape at times and man had been doing that since he found out he could. i don't see anything wrong with it but for some of us we don't have that off switch that says-ok time to get back to reality again. don't pickly me apart PJ i know my punctuations can be horrible. same goes for made up words too. besides history, geography, gym, i also flunked english as well... i was a very poor student.
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PAWS
Oct 16, 2015 10:21:02 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Oct 16, 2015 10:21:02 GMT -5
it's in our human make up to want to escape at times and man had been doing that since he found out he could. i don't see anything wrong with it but for some of us we don't have that off switch that says-ok time to get back to reality again. don't pickly me apart PJ i know my punctuations can be horrible. same goes for made up words too. besides history, geography, gym, i also flunked english as well... i was a very poor student. You know very well I wouldn't pick apart your punctuation, spelling, or anything else! Take that back right now or I'll punch you.
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PAWS
Oct 16, 2015 11:51:12 GMT -5
Post by JoeY on Oct 16, 2015 11:51:12 GMT -5
Where's Dave when i need him. he'd pick me apart like a vulture on a carcass.
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PAWS
Oct 16, 2015 14:41:32 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Oct 16, 2015 14:41:32 GMT -5
Where's Dave when i need him. he'd pick me apart like a vulture on a carcass. Indeed he would. I was one of the few people he could share grammar nerd jokes with. <-- Now, that right there? He'd say,"Jeesh PJ, nice grammar; I think you meant to say, "one of the few people with whom I could share grammar jokes."
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PAWS
Oct 16, 2015 16:45:14 GMT -5
Post by JoeY on Oct 16, 2015 16:45:14 GMT -5
nerds to tend to herd together
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Post by Sam on Oct 16, 2015 20:37:04 GMT -5
Sorry Mark you're feeling PAWS, I think PAWS should be discussed more in recovery rooms, knowing what to expect makes dealing with PAWS a bit easier. I suffer from PAWS and have for many years, I try to just deal with it as temporary feelings, not always easy. I also tell myself I'd rather go through PAWS than to be in a viscous cycle of drinking.
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PAWS
Oct 16, 2015 21:22:37 GMT -5
Post by jeyu0422 on Oct 16, 2015 21:22:37 GMT -5
Sam, You have discussed this before and I really appreciate the fact that you have. I actually think that learning about PAWS from you and others here probably saved me from relapse. I'm feeling better the last several days so it's a good time to reflect on things and learn from the experience. I feel that PAWS somewhat resembles an episode of depression in that the individual knows what is happening but is unable to do much other than hold on if possible until it passes. Knowing that PAWS would eventually pass made this doable for me. I know that few like this word except maybe old cowboys, but do you think there are 'triggers' that precipitate episodes of PAWS? I'm not high on being blindsided and if these events are predictable in some way, it may be possible to mitigate their effects. Mark/Jeyu
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Post by Sam on Oct 16, 2015 22:35:34 GMT -5
Hi Mark, I can only speak from my experience, when I had my extended time sober I experienced PAWS for the first year and half maybe two, after that I did not have PAWS symptoms. This leads me to believe PAWS isn't triggered by everyday life, rather it's a side effect to the mind trying to adjust to functioning without the influence of alcohol, and yes even after two years. Often times I would change moods in a matter of minutes where I go from happy or calm to feeling of void and depression, nothing happened to me that day to make me feel depressed, it could very well be my chemistry.
I also believe the degree in which a recovering alcoholic experience PAWS is tied to the amount of alcohol consumed and the length of addiction, it explains why some of us feel it even after two years or more of not consuming any alcohol, and other fortunate ones don't feel it at all.
The good news is with 18 months of sobriety your are well on your way to enjoy recovery PAWS free, congrats.
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PAWS
Oct 17, 2015 0:08:04 GMT -5
Post by Sam on Oct 17, 2015 0:08:04 GMT -5
One of the PAWS symptoms I sometimes feel is I become very sensitive, my emotions are on high alert, I am worried, concerned and scared, untrusting and protective. Another is physical and mental fatigue, I withdraw and dislike being with other people. My self confidence and self esteem are shaken, I am confused as to what the cause is, but it's there and all I can do is suffer while I wait it out.
PAWS can lead to a relapse as it happened to me many times, if true that part of the reason alcoholics drink is to escape, then what better way to escape PAWS than drinking?
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PAWS
Oct 17, 2015 4:07:17 GMT -5
Post by JoeY on Oct 17, 2015 4:07:17 GMT -5
Hi Mark, I can only speak from my experience, when I had my extended time sober I experienced PAWS for the first year and half maybe two, after that I did not have PAWS symptoms. This leads me to believe PAWS isn't triggered by everyday life, rather it's a side effect to the mind trying to adjust to functioning without the influence of alcohol, and yes even after two years. Often times I would change moods in a matter of minutes where I go from happy or calm to feeling of void and depression, nothing happened to me that day to make me feel depressed, it could very well be my chemistry. I also believe the degree in which a recovering alcoholic experience PAWS is tied to the amount of alcohol consumed and the length of addiction, it explains why some of us feel it even after two years or more of not consuming any alcohol, and other fortunate ones don't feel it at all. The good news is with 18 months of sobriety your are well on your way to enjoy recovery PAWS free, congrats. Hi Sam, i agree with your take on PAWS as my experience with it was very similar. funny thing is that its possible that if i didn't have PAWS i might very well have started drinking again (i'd like to think not though). as i've mentioned before i stopped for 4 months back in 1980 and picked up mainly because i felt great. that took me 16 years down the road where i quit again only that time i only lasted 5 weeks before picking up and again i was feeling great. the last time PAWS came with my quitting and i hurt so bad for so long that picking up again was even a consideration. i put in the same vain as aversion therapy. i'm glad to see you come so far Sam as i didn't think you would ever make it this far. i'm glad you're doing well too Mark but i'm not as keen at what your history was before you quit.
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PAWS
Oct 17, 2015 7:16:03 GMT -5
Post by jeyu0422 on Oct 17, 2015 7:16:03 GMT -5
Hi JoeY I drank for 30 plus years and was one of those non-existent 'functioning' alcoholics; I would work every day, start drinking on the way home, then drink until I fell asleep or sometimes blacked out every night. Like you, I quit several times for short periods only to start back again within several months. Your statement comparing PAWS to aversion therapy definitely has credibility. I have managed to avoid relapse partially because I have always felt that I could never do this again. Mark/Jeyu
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